“Missing someone on Valentine’s day” (ca. 2008)

I’m sincerely thankful for my family.  That includes Tatay, of course.  Despite the fact that my time with him was so limited, I praise the Lord that I have a father like him.

So as a way of remembering his supposed 66th birthday (February 13), I suddenly thought of re-visiting my old blog and immediately decided to post this brief article I wrote exactly four years ago.  It was originally titled, “Missing someone on Valentine’s day”. It’s not a masterful piece of art, but I assure you that this totally came from the heart.

Again, happy birthday, Tatay! We love you, and we miss you so much.

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“Tomorrow, the 13th of February, is my father’s birthday.  A lot of people know that I no longer have a dad ever since I was three.

I miss him, I must admit.

Many times I’d wish I was able to spend more time with him.  I wish I was able to learn chess, probably be adept at doing repairs (since like me, my father’s ever been interested with techy stuff), then learned swimming at a younger age.. I wish I had a father who’d cheer and applaud me during the competitions and the activities I got involved in.  I wish I was able to experience being carried by his strong arms during those times I tripped, fell from the bicycle, and got wounded.  I wish I had someone who’d give me a pat whenever I was upset and feeling such a loser.  Whew, a lot of wishes indeed.  If I’d go on and on, perhaps you’d end up in slumber.

I miss my dad. Yes. But despite the hurt and the seemingly insatiable longing , God has been faithful.  And I’m sure He will always be.

God showed me that He is my everlasting Father.  He is my Protector, my Mentor, my Healer… and He is the only Person (yes, that’s right) who can suffice [my deepest need].  He can fill anyone’s emptiness.  He can fill that void to overflowing.

Now, I know I had to go through the pains and the breaking just so God can teach me that I don’t have to rely on anyone else but Him.  He broke me to teach me that He alone can make me whole.  At times (or worse, many times).. we get to the point that we feel we have nothing and have no one to run to… [this is] just so we realize and learn to make God our everything.

I am convinced that this is just a portion of the refining process. Out of this, I’ll become better.  By God’s grace, I’ll hold on and endure.”


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